Rufus talks about class and Spurrier taps some ass!
Show 1: Rufus talks about Special Class
Today Rufus talked about special class again, and how he is 25 years old and STILL in what's like elementary school to retards. (Wait isn't all school elementary to them?) Rufus said that he didn't like some of his classmates. They include Linda, Barry, Johnny, and Timothy. Rufus said Linda was fat and never paid attention. He said he doesn't like her because she is too fat and she smells. Barry is a tall kid, who is always literally looking down on his classmates. He looks down on them, but not in a normal way, since his neck is locked in place as he stares blankly into space. Rufus said Johnny is a jackass, and he's always taking Rufus' pencil and trying to eat it. He also wears fancier t-shirts than the other kids and brags about it. Finally Rufus doesn't like Timothy because he is gay AND retarded. After talking about that, Rufus concluded that he will fight Ink Avenger at some point in return for all the chocolate Steve Spurrier is offering him. He said that he hoped the Easter Bunny (Betram?) will bring him lots of chocolate bunnies!
Show 2: Spurrier and "Tap the Ass"/ Gay Easter
Steve Spurrier came in with Manly Man Safari once again with him. Spurrier said he'd made the Manly Man the official masseuse for the USC football team. Spurrier said that Manly Man, with his 5 versions, could get him off a whole lot better than his wife ever could. Since Manly Man was that good to him, Spurrier decided to let the rest of the team share in the benefits. As for the team, Spurrier got them all together in preparation for football season this coming fall, and got them to play a game to increase their "strenth." He made all the boys bend over on the football field and stick their butts up in the air. Spurrier said this was a game he and his ex girlfriend used to play, called "Tap the Ass." Spurrier then ran all the way past the boys, tapping each one's ass as he ran by with his hand. Spurrier said that this was a new requirement for being a USC football player so long as he's in charge. Every new player has to have his ass tapped by Spurrier before he is accepted. Finally, Spurrier got another erection from his agression pills, and ran off to visit the other versions of Manly Man. Manly Man Safari stayed behind however and talked about Gay Easter, and made reference to Gaymas, held in the Ink Pitt a couple of years back. He said Gays everywhere celebrated Gay Easter, and that they too had their own "Sunrise Service." This service, however consists of lots of gay men and women doing unspeakable things to each other. Manly Man said he was going to ask Spurrier if they could have a Gay Easter Sunrise Service in Williams Brice Stadium!!! Manly Man Safari then said that USC actually stands for United Suckers of C*M before leaving.
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