Classic Pitt Report 17--ROTTENESS

Originally posted on my first blog, on Sunday March 4, 2007


Trodemus smells "ROTTENESS!!"

"Ahh yes, tonight the Prophet of Doom has your Sunday evening prophecy...Those who were present for the lucky moment will notice that changes are occuring, though they will not be fully aware what is happening. The one who leads the heiress to her destiny is completely oblivious to the change that is about to take place. This one is a fool, and does not see beyond it's own spoiled rotteness. Rotting indeed...it's rotteness smells to the familar Presence that the Prophet spoke of before. It smells, and is an offense to its nose. The rotteness will be struck down with a mighty blow, and it will never recover! The beast, who serves the rotteness, will also be smitten with a plague that shall counter the sickness that beast plans to spread on its minions. Then shall the Rotteness and the Beast be no more. All that will be left is the Core which gives them their power. The Core thinks that it will escape with its evil machinations, but the Prophet is here to cry loudly that such is simply not the case!! For I have seen far into the future, when this Core grows weak and feeble, and it's power dwindles. In the south whence it came, it is struck down and DIES!!! NO MORE SHALL THIS CORE TORMENT ANYONE UPON THE EARTH! SO SPEAKS TRODEMUS, PROPHET OF DOOM!!!"

The Classic Pitt Report updates six days a week on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 16--Familar Presence

Originally posted on my first blog, on March 3, 2007

Trodemus is the master of overly-detailed,

yet digressional prophecies!

"Tonight, the Prophet feels a familiar presence...and one he has not felt in some time. It is the presence of hope, the presence of all that is true and good. The presence of home. It gives me joy and peace unspeakable. The half of which has never yet been told. The dark days are still to come for the select few, but those days will not be as dark as originally thought. Hope has come to this earth, if only those who need it will but reach out. Emotions are too overwhelming for me to say anymore now, so...that is all."

The Classic Pitt Report updates six days a week on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Inkstains 2

It's the first meeting of my character with Kelly, the self-proclaimed
"Sexy Thai Lady!"

Classic Inkstains 2--Kelly Returns


Inkstains, characters, and stories are (C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 15--Digression from Silence

Originally posted on my first blog, on March 2, 2007


What the hell is Trodemus talking about?!?

"Ahh with the beginning of new night there comes a new prophecy from Trodemus, Prophet of Doom!!! As I gaze into the translucent paint on the wall, I see that things are beginning to unravel. Today, the clock was set into motion, as it ticks down the doom of the 7. One of the 7 is already in the state that one other shall soon be. The signs are everywhere, but those who are affected do not see it. From the silence comes a great digression. Also from this silence, there comes promise for a better tomorrow. When the silence becomes noise, those affected would just as well surrender all hope of rebellion. The evils continue to rise, as the time of the beast's return draws nearer. Woe unto those who must continue under the beast's control."

The Classic Pitt Report updates six days a week on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 14--First Prophecy

Originally posted on my first blog, on March 1, 2007


If the future is so dark, why does Trodemus
choose to pose on a grassy plain in this picture?

"Now that I have been revealed, I, TRODEMUS, PROPHET OF DOOM, can tell you all what needs to be told. I am a SEER, one who can see the future and predict what will come. I have been brought in by Peepers in this terrible time to forewarn a select group of people of the tragedy that is about to befall them.
Now my first prophecy: As I GAZE into the translucent glowing MAGICAL paint on the wall, I see visions! A time of great peril approaches for those very close to the sea. Magical, unholy green lights blot out the sky and part of the land. There is mass confusion and delirium. MANY are lost to evil for 2 days. During this time some are consumed and taken away by evil. Then...after the two day period of peril ends, a large BEAST rises from the street and sits BACK on its blood-encrusted throne. A giant "O" floats above its head. Those that give the beast power smile from afar. Perhaps this prophecy deals with something on the west coast..perhaps not. All that is known is that I have seen the future and I know what is to come! That...is all. "


The Classic Pitt Report updates six days a week on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Special Thanksgiving Story--The Turkey Man

It has always been strange to me that Thanksgiving has no holiday character that brings gifts or goodies. With Christmas, you’ve got Santa Claus, a fat jolly guy who has a penchant for breaking into people’s homes and leaving presents. On Valentine’s Day, you have Cupid, a half-naked baby thing who shoots arrows at the hearts of men and women to make them fall in love. Easter has the Easter Bunny, who somehow lays eggs and leaves baskets full of candy and fake plastic grass for children. Halloween has an assortment of ghosts, goblins, vampires, witches and many other scary creatures to represent it, not to mention the Great Pumpkin character from the Peanuts comic strip. So, a few years ago, while I was attending SCAD, I ended up changing this. I was given a project in one of my sequential art classes that required me to create a hybrid character. The character had to be part human and part something else. It could have human legs and an animal body. One of the most clichéd examples that came to mind is the mermaid character, which is a hybrid of a human woman and a fish. I remember drawing a mermaid as one of my possibilities, but I didn’t stick to it. I wanted to do something original and outlandish. It was then that I started thinking about how creepy turkeys are. I remember being afraid of them when I was young. My great aunt and uncle had a whole yard full of turkeys, which freaked me out. I then thought about the lack of a holiday character on Thanksgiving who gave things to people. Aside from the Pilgrims, Indians, and the turkey itself, there really was nothing that gave presents or brought good cheer to the holiday. So after lots of drawing, I came up with a character that had the body of a turkey and the arms, hands, feet, and legs of a man! The Turkey Man was born, and a legend was soon to follow. The basic story of the Turkey Man is that he comes to the home of one good little child every Thanksgiving, and lays a magical egg full of goodies (Hey I know it’s a male turkey, but the Easter Bunny is supposedly male, and he lays eggs!). That story sounds pleasant on paper, but evidently when the Turkey Man lays the egg, he screeches in pain and drops it, accompanied by feces and other bodily matter onto the chosen child’s bed! Hmm, maybe I haven’t brought more cheer to the holiday after all, but at least Thanksgiving now has a holiday character that does more than sitting around being thankful or getting eaten!


The Turkey Man is (C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson


BETRAM BUNNY MEETS THE TURKEY MAN:  https://pittreport.blogspot.com/2016/11/shit-pitt-betram-meets-turkey-man.html

Classic Pitt Report 13--Kidnapper Speaks!

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 28, 2007


Trodemus, Prophet of Doom!

"It is I, the One who kidnapped Mr. Peepers! I have taken Peepers to a secure location where he cannot harm anyone. I promise his safe return if all shall listen to the words I have to say. Now, even as I type, a change is coming. Powerful forces ride forth from beyond, bent on changing all that we know. The world we once knew will be splintered, shattered, broken in pieces!! Those who did evil and thought they had control shall be cut down, and all they claimed to own shall be taken from them! The one from the east shall return to the south. And the one from the north shall return whence it came. A bright light shines over the city of disgust. Liberation comes for those who seek it. No more shall the plague of this world torment one individual. That is all...for now. So speaks...TRODEMUS, PROPHET OF DOOM!"

The Classic Pitt Report updates six days a week on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 12--Hot Laundry Chick

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 26, 2007


What is going on with
the Peeping Device?

"So Peepers got his peeping device up and running. Now he see hot laundry chick in her apartment two buildings down hehe!! Maybe she taking shower or sleeping naked! Peepers adjusting range of device. Viewing apartment across from me...YUCK!!! Old lady in housecoat (Peepers neighbor across hall) is gross! Viewing next apartment...two Mexicans. Peepers not know what they saying...but it doesn't look like they going to strip any time soon lol. Besides they both male...Peepers not want to see that! Ahh now Peepers seeing into hot laundry chick's apartment. Where is she? Ahhh there she is...sitting on the couch watching tv!! She not undressed, but Peeping device fix that hehe!! Increasing power and resolution....about to see beneath her clothes! Wait what's happening???? It all going dark again! Can't see anything! Peepers not understand...he not using device anymore and room is still dark!! Someone in Peeper's apartment! Whats going---AHHHHHH!!!!"

WHO IS IN PEEPERS APARTMENT?!?

The Classic Pitt Report updates six days a week on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 11--Hot Chick Doing Laundry

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 25, 2007


Peepers excited about Hot
Laundry Chick!

"So Peepers go out to apartment complex's laundry a few hours ago and washed clothes. When Peepers there, Peepers see hot chick with low-cut top on! Peepers like but didn't want to arouse (hehe) her suspicison! So Peepers go back to his apartment and think of trying to view her with his special device. It may be hard, since her apartment will be obstructed by the others in front of it! Peepers may have to look at stuff he not want to see in order to see hot chick! Such is the price Peepers must pay! Peepers love being Peepers!! Who can stand in Peeper's shadow? Peepers not know...he never look back, but he always looking forward and out the window hehe!!!"



The Classic Pitt Report updates six days a week on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Inkstains 1

Back in 2003, I started drawing and writing a comic strip about my job at a t-shirt print shop, entitled Inkstains, which continues to this day. It includes comic strip versions of myself and my co-workers. The main characters (other than myself) include a drunken screenprinter and an overweight, oversexed Thai lady! I will be running the classic strips here every weekend until the debut off all-new episodes in a few months!

Classic Inkstains 1--Messing Up T-Shirts



Inkstains, characters, and stories are (C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 10--Bitchy GF

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 25, 2007


Peepers say He/She got it rough with bitchy GF!

"Today Peepers see He/She down in parking lot again, reading instructions about how to install more speakers into its car! Maybe he/she always go out and sit in car because gf (who is real girl far as Peepers know) is really bitchy and flaps her big mouth all the time! Peepers almost feel sorry for he/she. If he/she had stayed girl, he/she not have this problem...unless he/she become lesbian!! HEHEHEHHE!!"


The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 9--He/She

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 24, 2007


The He/She! Photo courtesy L. Debacker

"This morning, Peepers hear loud boom boom music coming from outside. Peepers look through blinds to see he/she neigbor who used to be a girl but now pretends to be guy. Peepers giggle to himself at how he/she try to carry itself. It walk with it's shoulders back and chewing gum like it big tough man. Peepers know its secret though! No matter how much he/she try to be man, it never really achieve manhood! He/She try to play music in car real loud because he/she is disatisfied with itself and wants others to feel its pain. It out there right now trying to act all manly by washing car in front of girlfriend who obviously not know it used to be girl. He/She no nothing about being a real man like Peepers! Peepers take he/she's girlfriend and give her what she's been missing hehehe!!!"

The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 8--Checking Pages

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 24, 2007


Peepers bides his time until night falls!

"So today, Peepers do something different. After sitting around for several hours waiting for night to fall so Peepers could use his device to peep, Peepers decide to pull out a porn magazine and look it over to make sure all the pages were still there. After seeing they were all intact, and performing another ceromony in front of the pictures, Peepers go and take a shower and hoped no one was peeping while he was naked! So once again tonight Peepers is going to use his device to peep!!"


The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 7--Tinkering Troubles

Originally posted on my first blog, on Februrary 21, 2007


Peepers is excited about his Peeping Device!

"So Peepers use new device to spy on hot ladies in his apartment community at night without leaving his bedroom! Peepers see all sorts of exciting things! Peepers see naked ladies showering (the device can see right through walls) and sleeping in the bed (through covers too). Peepers suprised to see lots of hot chicks in his apartment community sleep naked!! Even the two lesbians below Peepers sleep that way...and do other things naked as well hehe!!! The device malfuctioned for a few minutes tonight, and everything went dark. Strange. Peepers got it working again though!"

The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 6--Tinkering Results

Originally posted on my first blog, on Februrary 19, 2007


With new peeping device, Peepers not have to
go out looking like this!

"So after tinkering all night last night on new peeping device, Peepers finally finished! Now Peepers using the device, which allows Peepers to see through clothing and walls!! It now evening, so it the perfect time to peep into ladies' windows! With the device, Peepers not ever have to leave his room again hehe!!! "

The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 5--Tinkering

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 18, 2007


Peepers is excited about the prospect
of his peeping device!

"So Peepers working on special device now. Peepers' tinkering, if he succeeds, will allow Peepers to create a pair of binoculars that allows Peepers to have x-ray vision, and to see through walls!! Peepers very excited about this prospect!!!!!"


The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 4--Peepers' Road Trip

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 18, 2007


Peepers enjoys all the female
wonders at the beach!

"Today, Peepers return from weekend road trip where he view lots of hot ladies at a public beach! Peepers laid low, underneath an umbrella, but brought his binoculars so he could check out all the female wonders his eyes could stand! Now Peepers bored and got sunburn! Peepers thinking about doing some tinkering...after performing another of his ceromonies in front of pics of hot chicks!"


The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog! All characters, stories, photos, and performances are (C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 3--Valentine's Day Tradition

Originally posted on my first blog, on February 15, 2007



"Today Peepers participate in annual Valentine's Day tradition of pulling out all his photos of hot ladies and performing a ceremony in front of them! Most the ladies are some that Peepers photographed from his window. Others are from Playboy! Peepers not feel lonely after finishing the ceremony...Peepers feel alot better!!"

The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are
(C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 2--Nice View

Originally posted on my first blog site, on February 12, 2007

"Today, Peepers watch the lady outside who walks her dog in the space between her apartment building and Peepers'. Peepers is on the second floor, so Peepers get a good view of her breasts. Peepers got too excited, and had to go sit down!"

The Classic Pitt Report updates daily on this blog!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances are (C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Pitt Report

New Ink Pitt--Sterealizations pt. 4 of 5: “Trick Nor Treat”
Rufus the Retard returned home after leaving The Haunted House of Doom early on Halloween. He was met on the front porch by his mommy, Rachel. Rufus became worried. His mommy didn’t look at all pleased with him. “Rufus!! Where have you been? We were supposed to go trick or treating like we do every year!” Rufus’ eyes darted as he thought of an excuse. “Mommee, I go to Mr. Doom’s haunted house! He pay me money just for showing up!” Rachel’s eyes squinted as she became even more furious with him. “What!?! You’ve been hanging around that sinful Doom AGAIN? I told you not to go back there after last time!!! Why did you disobey me, Rufus?!?” Rufus looked down. “But Mommee, he pay me money even though I not play Fwankenstein! I get there and he tuwn off all the lights and I get scare and wun back home!” Rufus then squatted down on the ground and started crying. “He scare me, Mommee!!!” Rachel looked down at her retarded son, and felt sympathy for him…yet again. She knelt down and hugged him. “Oh, Rufus, I’m sorry. Mommy is sorry she yelled at you. I just want to keep you safe. Mr. Doom is not a bad man, but he has different beliefs that our own. You are very impressionable, and I don’t want you led astray from the Mormon faith! You understand why Mommy was worried about you don’t you?” Rufus smiled, clearly aware that he had once more manipulated his mommy. “Y-yes Mommee I undewstand! Now can we go twick o tweating?” Rachel sighed and told Rufus that it was too late in the evening and that he would now have to wait until next year. Rufus was distraught that he would not get to go out and get candy and let Rachel know. Rachel said that not participating in trick or treating this year was Rufus’ own fault since he ran off without telling her where he was going. Rufus began to cry again, but this time, Rachel showed no sympathy. When that didn’t work, Rufus remembered something his “daddy,” Lenny had done. Rufus raised his fist…and PUNCHED HIMSELF IN THE NUTS!!

The Pitt Report updates every Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday nights!
All characters, stories, photos, and performances are (C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Classic Pitt Report 1: Peepers Runnin' Wild

Originally Posted on my first blog site, on February 11, 2007

Mr. Peepers!

"So today, Peepers sat in his bedroom and thought about things. Things felt stale, so Peepers went and took his camera and made some new pics for his blog. Peepers struck lots of poses, and after viewing all the photos with Peepers' critical eyes, Peepers decide on only one to put up. It is photo you see above! Peepers feel it is his most iconic photo ever! After, that, Peepers got bored and went and looked out the window at the sexy next door neighbor!! Until next time...Happy Peeping!! Hehehehehe"

All characters, stories, photos, and performances are

© Copyright 2016 Joshua Dyson

Pitt Report Haunted House of Doom Excerpt

Excerpt from the Saturday, October 30, 2010 edition of the Pitt Report! Wilbur Hydrick shoots a promotional video for the Haunted House of Doom, and tells a story of "Horror in the Cornfield!"

The Pitt Report, all characters, stories, and performances are (C) Copyright 2010 Joshua Dyson

Inkstains Episode #72

Inkstains Episode #72: Thoughts on Kelly's Changing Persona pt. 2 of 2

Josh reflects on all his encounters with Kelly, the self-proclaimed, "Sexy Thai Lady," so far.